Jenn Says Stuff: Married to a Star Wars Nerd

I watched Star Wars as a child. I enjoyed it, but it did not become my world like it did many other children. I was too into Grease and being a Pink Lady in imaginary land to care much about a princess in space. I watched the “rest” of the shows (Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi) as a child because it was popular and it was at the Drive-In my parents took us to. Back then it was ok to be “into” nerdy stuff, but not extensively celebrated like it is today. My brother was into star wars, he even had the  blanket set to keep him warm at night, but to me, it was just a movie.

Fast forward to 1997, which was a long long time ago, in a galaxy…anyway… I met the man who was to eventually be my husband. He had just gone through a divorce and his only demands to his ex wife was that she leave his two cats and The VHS Star Wars Triology which he no doubt got from Columbia House. I thought “awe” to the cats and “nerd” the Star Wars. I guess everyone has to have something, and I met a man who collected pez and enjoyed Star Wars. That’s okay, it’s just three movies, or so I thought.  I remembered watching Star Wars with him while we were dating. He mouthed along to each word like he were at a midnight screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show. It was kind of cute, and to be fair, I was getting major good “beginning of a relationship sex”, so I was clouded by joy to see how truly nerdy this Star Wars obsession was.

Then, in 1999 I realized it was not over. That was the year Episode 1 came out. Yes, I still don’t understand how you start with Episode 4 and then 20 years later release Episode 1 but Star Wars people seem to understand the logic, and they are all that matters in this world. The movie was so anticipated that people slept outside for three days in Saskatchewan to get tickets to the movie. “NERDS,” I laughed and then found myself making lunches for my soon to be husband who was camping in nerdville. I came, gave him his food, marveled at all the people playing board games and wearing costumes and thought “this is the stupidest thing I have ever seen”. I went to the movie, was bored out of my mind, but my man was happy, and I guess this is just part of being the wife of a Star Wars person.

I accepted this and then bought him the Star Wars Trivial Pursuit Game. He played with my brothers. The trouble with this game is that Star Wars nerds know so much that the first person plays and then keeps playing because they never get a question wrong. They all rolled their eyes when I didn’t know what planet Luke Skywalker came from. SORRY, Tattoonie is now tattooed in my brain!

Each year on May 4th he would say “May the 4th be with you”. He’d then laugh and laugh. I’d smile, knowing it’s not funny but that this was a special day for him. Like Christmas for Christians, International Women’s Day for Feminists or St. Patrick’s Day for Alcoholics, it was his day and I would not make him feel bad about being a nerd. “Yes dear, May the 4th be with you as well”.

The movies kept coming out! Every two years I had to go to one of these films. What I noticed was that less people made fun of the Star Wars nerds. COS play became a thing and it seemed hip and fashionable to wear Star Wars or other “dress up” gear.  People were not making fun of Star Wars people anymore, it was us, those who weren’t big Star Wars fans that were the minority. We could no longer openly make fun of Star Wars people. It was sad, for making fun of nerds for being nerdy was one of my joys. Now they make fun of ME for my lack of nerd cred. Argh!

In 2015 a new Star Wars came out that had Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford reprise their roles. The husband took our boys, two new Star Wars nerds with him. They all came back with tears in their eyes. I went the next day to watch it with them again and found myself crying as well. I also cry at any movie where someone has to kill their father; I’d human like that. I had to help my husband through weeks of grieving. I should add he did less grieving for his own father; that he accepted as part of life, but Han Solo?  No, he was in denial.

We went to Rogue One. I enjoyed it. I really enjoyed it. Have the movies gotten better or am I starting to come around? Has 20 years of living with a Star Wars nerd starting to wear off on me? I will continue going to these movies, and wish all nerds a happy May 4th, because, I get it now. I get that this is a part of your childhood and life that continues and that the universe and world’s go far beyond the movies. I get it and I accept you. I even wore the Princess Leia costume once but that was strictly for sexual purposes.

There is no version in my life that will convert my husband like I am converted to Star Wars. He still does not enjoy Grease, laughed at the ending of The Notebook and is not exactly “Mr. Romantic”, that is, until I put the costume on.

May the 4th be with you.

Also floss.

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